Help Debts

Posts Tagged ‘sleep’

It seems that couples that "fall in love" or get married do so, due to a feeling of love only to discover all of these issues later. Examples include…. (no particular order)

Do I want kids, how many, how to raise them (strict or lax parent)?

Religious practice, (are you religious, do you actually practice, raise kids in a religious manner)

How do you handle your finance, saver/spender, debt levels – debt maintenance

Does the partner have any career aspirations, career possibilities, upward mobility or will he/she be in this same position for the rest of their lives amidst higher expenses

Personal habits, cleanliness, habits around others (such as friends, family, kids)

Communication skills when everything goes wrong at once (most people find it easy to get along together when everything is fine – horrible proxy, prudent to rationalize and plan for worst case scenario than assuming everything will be fine – such as a recession/depression/death/injury, etc.)

This are just a few things I thought off. (Note: Certain statements are in the second person because I wrote it as it came to my head).

I feel like even though most people don’t realize it, the standards for everyone to sleep, date, love and marry a person are completely different. For me personally, each standard is substantially more rigorous than the last.

I am a 35 year old woman and I don’t work. No one would hire me because I haven’t been employed for several years now. I live with my father, her gf and their kids. I dont receive any governent support and financially depend on my dad and use credit cards. I have amassed a huge school loan (50K) since I went to graduate school as well. I just babysit my half sisters and brother but I don’t want this life anymore. My dad does care for me since he does want me to move out and find a nice and stable guy, so I feel pressured to do so, but deep down I have virtually zero interest in being in a relationship.

Sometimes I feel like ending it all, and I always cry in my sleep. I feel like I am a disappointment to my family. I just wish to find a good job so I can move out and be financially independent and debt free. I dont know what to do anymore I feel like I am stuck in a rut.

I guess I want advice on how to get out of this rut and start my life. Should I get a loan and move to the midwest and try my luck there in finding a job? Or join the military/army/marines/airforce/navy or anything in the gov’t that will forgive my school loans, but I think I’m too old for that.. Or do I have a chance to do that still?

I dont have any friends to talk about this so I appreciate any advice that you can give me. Thank you

I am having really bad depression issues,
Mainly because I am financially in debt, and can’t afford my rent or bills for next month, and my hours at work got cut back bad.
And because of the fact that my mom and brother (only family of mine who live close by) hate my bf, which is putting a huge strain on our relationship, because he wants to be able for us all to get along, and yes he did do things that he shouldn’t of that made them mad, but not things they should be holding onto for months.
The car I drive is unregistered and the only person who can get it registered is my mom, but for some reason she just won’t do it, I even printed out the papers for her, and she lost them! I can’t drive the car once my baby is born if it is unregistered, and she just won’t help me. I have to have a car to get to work dr apps. Etc.. (it was my grandparents car, they both passed away, the trust is in my moms name, there for the car is technically hers).
Idk I’m so stressed out, and its getting harder and harder to deal with, I am never happy anymore, and I just want to sleep all day, I go to work and other then that stay home all the time, I don’t want to be around anyone including my family or boyfriend.
I want to be problem free before my baby is born so I can give her the best life possible, but it just seems like nothing is ever going to get better…..
Ok so my venting is done for now…..
What can I do to start making things better?
I want to be a happy mommy, and I don’t want all my energy to be consumed with my issues, because I know I will need it all for her.
Any advice please.

my brother has been doing his own business for the past years, and is not doing well, he does not want to end it and in a lot of debts, he does not go to his office for sometime now but insist that his business still in operation.he turns to gambling for big money but end up losing more and still keep finding people to invest or funds his company.
i had so many time ask him to wind up the business, get a job, paid all debt and start afresh but he say if he closed now, he loses big sum of money. Nobody in the family is able to get thru to him.

i actually enstranged from him for almost a year( i really pissed off, becoz we sold our house to clear his debts) , he himself never even give a phone call my parents since then.

Recently he called me up and saying he havind a very rough time and ask for a small amount of loan, but i do not agree and say if he want my help he can come back to my new house anytime ( i did so becoz my mother misses and worry about him too much) and yes he did come back after a month. and is only been a week and i think i’m losing it….

ok here are the point and what should i do? (B4 his financial crisis, he is a very resposible young man, why this is happening?)
1. i believes that his company is not in operation, even if it does, it must be in a very bad shape.
2. he gambled if he has the money (he also loses a lot in share market before) he just want big money now
3. few thousand dollars is not enough monthly salary for him and he rather sit in from of a computer keep posting for people to buy his company or asking for loan
4. he potentially will go to illegal money lender??!! i know…
5. he is turning into a loser who don’t want to get a job, just eat and sleep and everything is free.
6. OMG, can he still be saved??

I have/had good credit, went ‘little’ overboard and now in US 0K in credit card debt, all of it invested in stock market which is now worth less than 10K. Even though I’m a professional and have a job,

To pay it all, it will take me 7 years if I were to just eat free air/water, sleep on the street, or at least 20 years by continuing my current life style.

Do I have any other options to get out of this mess?

File bankruptcy and then move to Canada, Europe or even run away to Montana leaving no change of address trail.

Any ideas???

Please help/advice
What if I run away to a country with credit cards?

can I ?
What if I run away to a country with "NO" credit cards until they forget?

can I ?

So, I’m kind of in a huge mess, financially. I am buried in bills and I get collection agencies calling me daily. Let me just start off by saying I’m 20 and I’m a full-time student. My parents recently got divorced and I decided to move out with my dad, with whom I said I would pay 0 rent if I were to move out with him. I have a part-time job that pays 0 every 2 weeks.(Here’s my living situation: I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with my dad. I get no privacy, and I sleep in the living room) So yeah, I pay the 0 each month, but it’s beginning to hold me back from paying my bills that include car insurance, phone bill, and other debts (medical,school, credit card etc.) I need to get free of debt!! I want to live my life! I want to travel! i feel if I pay 0 in rent I could get these debts payed. and I’ve mentioned this before to my dad, but he’s very clear that he needs this 0 because his job doesn’t cover paying for the apartment. So basically he needs me. But I don’t think it’s fair because If I weren’t here, he’d have to pay the entire rent. I just need advice. How should I go about asking to pay less without him freaking out on me?

I am 37, female, professional, extremely hard working and responsible, single and childfree both by choice. Dedicated all my life to work (not regrets-I am very well known and respected in my work internationally). I have a 63 year old mother whom I support financially (she has no income). She has a very hard time showing her loving feelings – and to my understanding she has many unsolved issues with her own mother and her ex-husband (my father) which always haunted our family. I have a 34 year old brother, intelligente, healthy, university educated who was raised up to beleive that if he put enough drama, he would always get what he asked for (and actually he did). Expensive cars, very expensive apartment, ridiculously expensive life whilst he was a student – whilst he never worked, even if we had a family business and we could use his help. I had to work all my life to obtain what I wanted, but this was my choice. My family was a wealthy one, who now are in deep economical crisis.
That big a crisis, now going on for the last 10 months, that there was a time that there was not enough money to eat andwe are facing the posibility to loose our house (my mother’s house).

During that time my brother (who was living in my house after he lost his and went to bankrupcy), he would not do anything at home, would not help me with coping with business and economical problems, would get drunk all day (because he was "stressed" and "we ruined his life", would be verbally abusive to my mother (though I must admit she does not know how to handle anything when it comes to feelings – she breaks my b…s too, but still…she is a old woman and my mother who must be treated with respect), and do anything he could to make things even worse that they were. he would live, drink, sleep and spend on my money. My mother also lived in my house since we could not afford to have it otherwise. She would do the cleaning, cooking and shopping all by herself as I must work very long hours and my brother wont lift a finger.

Two weeks ago I talked to him for last time: you either help me finish liquidating our only business and we take it from there as a family and we recover, you assist at home with cleaning, shopping and everything a home needs, you stop drinking NOW and put your feet in the ground or you leave this house right NOW and never come back.

Did I mention he is lazy and also admits it?

Well, he left. Once minute later the usual fight with my mother who thinks I am too cruel and we should support him because he is weak and confused. To cut a long story short, I told her that I had enough of him and her in this respect and I need to stay calm in order to survive this very difficult bankrupcy and see what i can do in the future to guarantee life for me and her. Period. anything else now is secondary. Her son must leave house and she must go home (I managed to make some money to be sure she will be ok for the next 6 months. She left. She called 2 days later to tell me that what happened was the correct thing and that she loves me and hopes my brother finds his way in life.

I forgot to mention: my father, another abusive relationship, is a scam, pathologic lyer, who tried to get what money was left out of the business and leave. i stopped him, as this money must be directed to paying debts. Then he left inadvertedly and here I am:

Alone, in a country far away from mine, where I do not longer wish to be, with no money, trying to liquidate my business in order to pay debts (though legally speaking I am allowed to simply declare banckrupcy and nothing happens), under very difficult circumstances, finally away from an abusive, scam father, with a brother who I care for but will not take him any more, a mother whom I love but wish she would be away from me and well and feeling extremely tired.

I am not afraid of life. Not at all. I don’t care about the loss of money or business. These I can do and loose again and again and again. But I feel this is too much for one person. I am sure I did the right thing asking my brother to make up his mind and asking my mother to leave (she was going to get ill with all this happening around her). But still…

They are my family – not matter how abusive, they will always be my family.

This was the first time in my life I made a point and kept to it. It worked so far. My brother, knowing there is nobody to turn to for cash, is moving towards finding a job and I think he stopped drinking. Mom is back home together with the rest of the family and certainly better than here. My father – well, I don;t care. He can be anywere, as long as there is an ocean between us. Enough is enough.

Did I do well?
How does all that sound?

Thanks your answers